While it's not a big deal, I mean fingerprints are free at the sheriff's office, it is just frustrating. Finding time to run and get it done with 3 littles and Evan's work schedule is kind of a pain, especially since they are only open 2 days a week for a specific few hours. However, I think this is just the beginning of some of the frustration we will go through in this process. I have been following a sweet family on FB who just brought their son home from Uganda. The mom was describing the CRAZY amounts of paperwork they were doing and the insane wait times in Africa. Someone posted on her post something to the effect of "This is like your labor for your little guy." I loved that! Between my pregnancies for my3 bio kids, I experienced: extreme nausea and vomiting, weight gain (some baby...mostly ice-cream), cravings, too many stretch marks to count, back pain, pulling my sciatic nerve, intense contractions, pitosin, a normal delivery, surgery, infection, stitches, hard recovery, needles, tests, exams, etc. Going through all of this paperwork is NOT fun, it is time consuming and sometimes just annoying! But, when I think of it as my labor for my son, it puts it all in perspective.
I remember with my first, Dixie Jean, I went in with a typed birth plan (Did any of first time mom's do that?) Yea, well, I pretty much threw that out of the window as soon as labor started. This process is kind of the same way. Things aren't going to go the way I plan or I think they should. There are going to be bumps in the road, but one day down the road, I will have my little dude in my arms and all the paperwork will be a distant memory. Kind of like after you have a baby and you have just been through the most God awful pain of your life and suddenly in a year you're like, "That wasn't so bad, I think I want to do it again." Thank you God for making us forget the pain, the sickness, the loss of our body (ok, I still haven't forgotten this one). So, we keep pressing on through paperwork, laboring for our son, fighting for him, because if we don't, who will?
I have been thinking about him a lot this week. I dream about him, his dark hand in mine. I think of scooping him up and hugging and hugging and hugging him, praying that he knows how much I love him. Dixie talks about him all the time "I want my brother in Ethiopia. He's crying for me. I'm crying for him." She is so sensitive to her brother already. She has no idea the time frame we are in for, she wouldn't understand. Last night Evan and I had a date night and went back to where we had our first date 10 years ago. We talked about how far we have come, how we would never have dreamed that we would have 3 kids and be in the process of adopting from Ethiopia. Adoption wasn't even a thought in our minds for future plans. I am so thankful that God changes the heart, that he prompts, that he presses, that he pursues, that he challenges. My love and desire for our son grows more and more everyday.
This week I was sent the most precious gift by a most precious person in my life, my mother in law. When I opened it, my heart dropped (in a good way). It was this gorgeous bracelet with all of our kid's names on it. Yes, there is a name under that tape (But....you can't see that yet. My husband hasn't actually made up his mind on that). The side tag says 8568 (do you recognize that number?) I am in love with this bracelet and what it stands for. It is serving as a constant reminder to me that we are so blessed and the plan that God has for our family. That we are a family unit because of him. It's a reminder to pray over my kids that he has entrusted me with and to keep laboring. It may sound silly, but having this bracelet on, makes me feel closer to my boy, like he is ALREADY part of the family, and he is.
Don't forget that Monday is the LAST day to pre-order your McGinty adoption shirts!
Unveil his name!!!! ;-)
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